First, I am not going to disagree with Pearl. I learned a while ago that she is much wiser than I am.
Each time I do a funeral I am reminded how utterly complicated our lives are and that the very qualities that may make us beloved by some may hurt others. The parent who was always volunteering may have children who feel like they were never home. A parent who made time for others may have left kids waiting for them.
It is fair to remember and not to cover up the pain Tim Keller’s theological views have caused others; just as it fair to acknowledge and to give thanks for what he did that was good. As you said - and he would not have denied - Tim Keller was human.
This paragraph spoke to me deeply as a person who often writes of place from "outsider" perspectives:
"There are ten thousand ways to tell the story of any place. Mine was just one—and just because it didn’t hew to the standard narratives that give primacy to those who have been seen as wielding conventional power and holding traditional wealth doesn’t make it inaccurate."
This was something I learned as a magazine editor. When I first started editing, I would reshape every story into my version. Eventually I learned that my job was rather to make it the best-possible version of that writer's piece, not my own.
Thank you for this far-reaching, honest and very helpful piece of writing. Only today I was discussing with my 30 year old son about how I used to be so blinkered about what being a ‘Christian’ looked like! Like I used to not like my kids to read Harry Potter because of witches, and other skewed thinking that I picked up from church. My husband discovered very early in my Christian walk that there was too much hypocrisy and he would have nothing to do with church.
I’m in full agreement with your articulate and thought-provoking piece. I am very grateful to have read it and that it confirms and helps my thought process, so that I can better explain / articulate to others if/when a discussion comes up in the future.
And yes we are only human and that’s how God made us.
Even if the thinking was skewed, I also want to honor the protective parental heart that didn't want her kids to read something that might put them in danger. I hope you can be gentle with your past self and recognize the good intentions, even amidst the less-than-desirable behavior.
I really appreciate your perspective in Tim Keller (someone I apparently avoided knowing about until my twitter feed blew up with a wild mix of memoriums). One of the hardest addictions to combat right now seems to be this constant pull towards harsh dichotomy -we’re all demanding full allegiance or full rejection of people, ideas, experiences, even preferences. Most of life is so much more layered, filled with nuance-the beauty even more startling laying beside the rot and banal. I appreciate your recognition of that almost as much as your gentle spirit. Take care!
Hello Jeff, from your old pastor (yea, PCA 😜) and your faithfully appreciative older brother! This is a respectful and balanced memorial. One small copy edit (from one who was there!) You write: "During my high-school years in Miami, my family and I attended Immanuel, a congregation belonging to Keller’s denomination, the Presbyterian Church in America, that was planted with Redeemer’s support." But the "planting" (gardening friend) was in the reverse order. Immanuel was approached to contribute funds to the "New York City Project" (later Redeemer). An anonymous donor pledged stock options to be matched by our members, flew Tim to Miami to fill the Immanuel pulpit, then flew the two of us first-class to NYC and I attended one of the first Redeemer services at Church of the Advent Hope (SDA) and helped the Kellers move to Roosevelt Island. We remained decades-long friends and my grieving is not over a hero. As I love to say, there's only been One righteous Hero and One worthy Victim in human history - and it's not you or me! So you're shunning the hero/victim binary is admirable. We love you friend!
As a choral conductor at a christian university I'm drawn to your sharing of Requiem. I don't believe Mary does intercede for us. I think the blood of Jesus is all that's necessary, so I like your take on the words dealing with her humanity.
I appreciate how you emphasize the “both-and” of our humanity. Our brains seek to categorize into good and bad, but our challenge is to hold the tension of the two. We are complex beings but loved beyond measure. Our complexity makes the prospect of grace possible; otherwise, we would somehow assume we earned it. Thanks for a gracious eulogy that held that tension!
I think that what you said of Tim Keller can be said of all of us...he helped some, he hurt some and some he both helped and hurt. I’m certain this is true of myself...I see this most as a parent but am sure it is true in all of my relationships. One of my favorite things to say recently is that each person contains multitudes. We are complex...it’s part of being human. It doesn’t mean we shouldn’t call out harm. It just means we don’t get to define someone by one thing. I also think that when a public figure dies, we think our choices are heroism or denouncement. It’s just not true. God is the true hero in every person’s story and the gospel is water down when we put individuals on the hero pedestal. But it is also watered down when we kick them to the ground In denouncement. All is Grace.
I was never interested in becoming a Tim Keller fan. But after reading your review Jeff I no wonder if I could have at least read a sermon or two, I’m 85 and still learning. I feel you are my brother and I always read your stuff. Wilma rabidoux Hudsonville mi. Hillcrest CRC
Hi Jeff, I very much appreciate your Notes. I think it was through Sarah Bessy or maybe it was Rachel Held that I was introduced to your writing. Both Sarah and Rachel were touchstones for me as I slid then tumbled away from 30 years of fundamentalism. Sarah’s essay on Keller moved me to tears (as her writing is wont to do 😊). When I heard that Keller had passed, my immediate reaction defaulted to hurt and good riddance. Then, I remembered (thank you Sarah) the difficulty of holding space for the other when the hurt is fully realized. On reflection of all that I’ve read on this, I think your words have impacted me the most: “I’ve long believed that one of the most audacious things a person can do is to insert himself into another’s relationship with the divine.” Yes and Amen.
Thankful for your reflections on Tim Keller's death, my friend. Your generous and honest perspective helps me process my thoughts and feelings. Thanks for including Sarah's reflections too. They were also a gift. I look forward to your writing each week. They are food for my journey. I give thanks to God for you, Jeff!
Thank you Jeff. You have taught me so much, and continue to teach me, about holding the both/and in tension. Someone can both help and hurt, and you and Sarah both point me to the remembrance that I do the same, just not in a public way. While I do believe that those preaching and teaching should be held to a higher standard of care for people, they also are humans. And we can offer grace, despite our differences and despite the ways they hurt those we love.
I think the kindest thing we can do for ourselves and others is to not participate in the vitriol of polarization that seems to take over every conversation on social media.
Also, I love the beautiful grace you showed us through Pearl. So unique and gentle but with a strength that refuses to back down from who she is in God.
First, I am not going to disagree with Pearl. I learned a while ago that she is much wiser than I am.
Each time I do a funeral I am reminded how utterly complicated our lives are and that the very qualities that may make us beloved by some may hurt others. The parent who was always volunteering may have children who feel like they were never home. A parent who made time for others may have left kids waiting for them.
It is fair to remember and not to cover up the pain Tim Keller’s theological views have caused others; just as it fair to acknowledge and to give thanks for what he did that was good. As you said - and he would not have denied - Tim Keller was human.
lolol always a good idea not to disagree with Pearl.
This paragraph spoke to me deeply as a person who often writes of place from "outsider" perspectives:
"There are ten thousand ways to tell the story of any place. Mine was just one—and just because it didn’t hew to the standard narratives that give primacy to those who have been seen as wielding conventional power and holding traditional wealth doesn’t make it inaccurate."
Thank you 🙏🏻
This was something I learned as a magazine editor. When I first started editing, I would reshape every story into my version. Eventually I learned that my job was rather to make it the best-possible version of that writer's piece, not my own.
Thank you for this far-reaching, honest and very helpful piece of writing. Only today I was discussing with my 30 year old son about how I used to be so blinkered about what being a ‘Christian’ looked like! Like I used to not like my kids to read Harry Potter because of witches, and other skewed thinking that I picked up from church. My husband discovered very early in my Christian walk that there was too much hypocrisy and he would have nothing to do with church.
I’m in full agreement with your articulate and thought-provoking piece. I am very grateful to have read it and that it confirms and helps my thought process, so that I can better explain / articulate to others if/when a discussion comes up in the future.
And yes we are only human and that’s how God made us.
Here’s to loving each other better! 💙
Even if the thinking was skewed, I also want to honor the protective parental heart that didn't want her kids to read something that might put them in danger. I hope you can be gentle with your past self and recognize the good intentions, even amidst the less-than-desirable behavior.
I really appreciate your perspective in Tim Keller (someone I apparently avoided knowing about until my twitter feed blew up with a wild mix of memoriums). One of the hardest addictions to combat right now seems to be this constant pull towards harsh dichotomy -we’re all demanding full allegiance or full rejection of people, ideas, experiences, even preferences. Most of life is so much more layered, filled with nuance-the beauty even more startling laying beside the rot and banal. I appreciate your recognition of that almost as much as your gentle spirit. Take care!
Hello Jeff, from your old pastor (yea, PCA 😜) and your faithfully appreciative older brother! This is a respectful and balanced memorial. One small copy edit (from one who was there!) You write: "During my high-school years in Miami, my family and I attended Immanuel, a congregation belonging to Keller’s denomination, the Presbyterian Church in America, that was planted with Redeemer’s support." But the "planting" (gardening friend) was in the reverse order. Immanuel was approached to contribute funds to the "New York City Project" (later Redeemer). An anonymous donor pledged stock options to be matched by our members, flew Tim to Miami to fill the Immanuel pulpit, then flew the two of us first-class to NYC and I attended one of the first Redeemer services at Church of the Advent Hope (SDA) and helped the Kellers move to Roosevelt Island. We remained decades-long friends and my grieving is not over a hero. As I love to say, there's only been One righteous Hero and One worthy Victim in human history - and it's not you or me! So you're shunning the hero/victim binary is admirable. We love you friend!
Thank you for the factcheck, Pastor Al! I will correct.
As a choral conductor at a christian university I'm drawn to your sharing of Requiem. I don't believe Mary does intercede for us. I think the blood of Jesus is all that's necessary, so I like your take on the words dealing with her humanity.
I appreciate how you emphasize the “both-and” of our humanity. Our brains seek to categorize into good and bad, but our challenge is to hold the tension of the two. We are complex beings but loved beyond measure. Our complexity makes the prospect of grace possible; otherwise, we would somehow assume we earned it. Thanks for a gracious eulogy that held that tension!
Jeff, I really appreciate your measured words about the death of Tim Keller. Yes, we are all humans who will have a legacy of helping and hurting.
I think that what you said of Tim Keller can be said of all of us...he helped some, he hurt some and some he both helped and hurt. I’m certain this is true of myself...I see this most as a parent but am sure it is true in all of my relationships. One of my favorite things to say recently is that each person contains multitudes. We are complex...it’s part of being human. It doesn’t mean we shouldn’t call out harm. It just means we don’t get to define someone by one thing. I also think that when a public figure dies, we think our choices are heroism or denouncement. It’s just not true. God is the true hero in every person’s story and the gospel is water down when we put individuals on the hero pedestal. But it is also watered down when we kick them to the ground In denouncement. All is Grace.
I love the song Requiem by Eliza Gilkyson. The whole CD is excellent
I love the Requiem song. Thank you for the recommendation.
I was never interested in becoming a Tim Keller fan. But after reading your review Jeff I no wonder if I could have at least read a sermon or two, I’m 85 and still learning. I feel you are my brother and I always read your stuff. Wilma rabidoux Hudsonville mi. Hillcrest CRC
Hi Jeff, I very much appreciate your Notes. I think it was through Sarah Bessy or maybe it was Rachel Held that I was introduced to your writing. Both Sarah and Rachel were touchstones for me as I slid then tumbled away from 30 years of fundamentalism. Sarah’s essay on Keller moved me to tears (as her writing is wont to do 😊). When I heard that Keller had passed, my immediate reaction defaulted to hurt and good riddance. Then, I remembered (thank you Sarah) the difficulty of holding space for the other when the hurt is fully realized. On reflection of all that I’ve read on this, I think your words have impacted me the most: “I’ve long believed that one of the most audacious things a person can do is to insert himself into another’s relationship with the divine.” Yes and Amen.
Thankful for your reflections on Tim Keller's death, my friend. Your generous and honest perspective helps me process my thoughts and feelings. Thanks for including Sarah's reflections too. They were also a gift. I look forward to your writing each week. They are food for my journey. I give thanks to God for you, Jeff!
Thank you Jeff. You have taught me so much, and continue to teach me, about holding the both/and in tension. Someone can both help and hurt, and you and Sarah both point me to the remembrance that I do the same, just not in a public way. While I do believe that those preaching and teaching should be held to a higher standard of care for people, they also are humans. And we can offer grace, despite our differences and despite the ways they hurt those we love.
I think the kindest thing we can do for ourselves and others is to not participate in the vitriol of polarization that seems to take over every conversation on social media.
Also, I love the beautiful grace you showed us through Pearl. So unique and gentle but with a strength that refuses to back down from who she is in God.
Jeff, thanks for the article. I agree and the perspectives given has only helped me to understand with more grace.