Thank you for your writing! My students just put on The Laramie Project this week, so Fred Phelps has been on my mind.
Your question of how folks respond or engage or don’t when you write about your Asian identity has me thinking. I don’t engage directly with a lot of Public Intellectuals that I follow out of a sense of boundaries and probably social anxiety. I see folks on Instagram actively asking their followers to not DM them because it’s presumptive to ask of their time and energy. But then does that leave us as readers in a purely consumeristic position? As in your job is to produce and my job is to read and consume? I don’t like how that feels. Building community online can feel so bizarre.
Back to the question of when you write about your Asianness. Do we as white folks just engage when there’s a recipe bc of some internalized Orientalistic views? Or is it some form of Communion, that food is a way to sit together for a little while? Maybe a little bit of both?
Your wrote an essay a few months back in which you used a Chinese structure for your writing - I haven’t read it in some time, but I remember you circling around a central idea several times. As an English teacher, this piece really stuck with me. I spend inordinate amounts of time teaching The Structure of Writing Good Essays (often linear, often hierarchical), and your piece was so helpful for me to see my own limitations.
Thank you for sharing your writing; your emails truly are a highlight of my week.
Jeff, I very much would love to read anything and all that you would write or share about your heritage, your chinese culture, your chinese american experience, or anything of the sort. I, personally have so much to learn and love learning from your stories. I am grateful for your perspective.
Megan Phelps-Roper's existence gives my so much hope. I can't imagine what it must have been like for to step away from her church and her family. I'm so deeply grateful for her courage and her willingness to speak out, in grace, and ask for forgiveness.
And I'm so grateful for you Jeff for writing all this out so beautifully. Please write more about heritage / Chinese-Americanness, I want to hear more.
Your willingness to share your heart is not taken for granted. As an older, Canadian born, white, CIS gendered female, I feel like I might not have the right credentials to comment on an American Asian gay experience. That might be why some of us stay silent, even as we read your words to learn. Thank you for persisting!
Thank you for your words. Your writing always makes me think. I love what you said about Westbro and your friend and how the mental processing took time. And I agree that grace is easier said than done.
I admit, I’m not a cook so I scroll through the recipes. I would love to read more about your heritage and how it affects the way you see the world. I read the article on Steven Yeun and appreciate you linking it for us.
I rarely post anything. Anywhere. But as I read all these wonderful articulate thoughtful comments of other folks I am prompted to take a risk to say how meaningful your work has been to me too. My hope is that you are encouraged- good writing is hard & requires energy that must be next to impossible to tap during these times. But you are doing it. We appreciate you Jeff. Thank you for all u give and please be well.
Thank you Jeff for sharing this interesting piece about Korean family immagrants. I feel like I just had an inside look at how a child felt as he moved from Korea to America. I am so thankful for your writing and letting me learn from you as you share your "insides" too. You make life more interesting and beautiful!
Jeff this is beautiful. On the days i'm not sure i can believe what keeps me going is my firm belief in repentence, grace and reconciliation. I've stuggled a lot this past year with the Church and your steadfast faithfulness to loving your neighbor has been such a blessing to me. I know it's not a christian text but reading Megan's memoir this past summer had me in tears and was absolutely a spiritual experience. My husband who is on his own deconstruction journey references your compost spin on calvinist total depravity regularly. You have a beautiful way of describing what is broken and what is being resurrected. Your perspectives on your heritage, being gay in a conservative family, and being part of the reformed tradition continue to inspire and challenge me. So grateful and blessed to have the words of both of you in my life. Thank you.
A huge measure of grace brought Megan out of the darkness and into a friendship with you. She will be able to provide her daughter with an upbringing she never could have dreamed of for herself. I hope she finds her way to believe in God .He knows the correct timing for that.
thank you for telling us the story of a beautiful grace filled human named Megan. And you too! This softened my heart today. I look forward to reading the piece on Steven Yeun too.
I first found you when you spoke for us by video at Crosspointe Church in Cary NC . I have been following you since and I have to say, I find what you write to be wonderfully comforting and reassuring, while also challenging my biases. And that is GOOD.
I see so much of myself in Megan's story. I didn't grow up in a Westboro exactly, but I did grow up in a very far right Southern Baptist church and then went to Liberty Univ in the early 90's and on to similar churches for much of my adult life.
Things were very black and white and Grace fit only in the place where "by Grace you are saved through faith". It didn't really go anywhere else because that would be giving folks a "pass" or permission or an excuse for their "sin" (aka, choice, behavior, belief, DIFFERENCE from us). "You know, people have to be held accountable for their behaviors.... "
I am sooooo very grateful to have had people like you, and Jonathan Bow and Stephen Daugherty who are brave enough to say, listen folks, FIRST Grace then truth. To remind us that Jesus died for us all. That my personhood is the same as everyone else's and I am not special because I'm a white cis-gendered female.
What is special is that as a white cis-gendered female I have, in this country, innate privilege and that can make me a powerful ally for others. I used to not know that. I couldn't see that, and I didn't really want to. Because, now I have a responsibility. A divine responsibility to be the hands and feet of Christ, in all the ways that I am uncomfortable.
Not just a little uncomfortable at the crisis pregnancy center where it feels familiar and easy to explain why I'm there, but a lot uncomfortable at the Pride march where my extended family will wonder if I have lost my mind, and many of them will be angry with me. I have for a long time seen people in " Mom hugs" and "Dad hugs" shirts at LGBTQ+events and wondered... what if I came in a 'Evangelical Christian Republican hugs' shirt? Would there be any takers? Would they be afraid? How do I say, "I see you, I see your value and worth and the hand of the Divine on you? Not because it wasn't there, but because I was BLIND!" without making it about me? How do I repair the bias and bigotry I know I have had in my heart for 20+ years that I thought was righteous, without it being about ME? How do I say I'm sorry without it being for ME? Enough with ME already....
I'm unraveling a lifetime of this mess in my heart and I am so grateful to have your words, and insight and heart to lean on and learn from.
I was reminded of all the people that I harmed when I had an adulterous affair with my husband and how I was labeled a brazen Hussi by the pastor when I wanted to repent. And other women in our small town who treated like the woman at the well.
Jeff- thanks for sharing this story. Since a brief and rewarding encounter with you a one of the "Why Christian" events, and reading about your Grandmother.... Dorothy and I frequently follow your stories knowing you will reveal to us things both visceral and profound. God bless you, Brother!
Hello!
Thank you for your writing! My students just put on The Laramie Project this week, so Fred Phelps has been on my mind.
Your question of how folks respond or engage or don’t when you write about your Asian identity has me thinking. I don’t engage directly with a lot of Public Intellectuals that I follow out of a sense of boundaries and probably social anxiety. I see folks on Instagram actively asking their followers to not DM them because it’s presumptive to ask of their time and energy. But then does that leave us as readers in a purely consumeristic position? As in your job is to produce and my job is to read and consume? I don’t like how that feels. Building community online can feel so bizarre.
Back to the question of when you write about your Asianness. Do we as white folks just engage when there’s a recipe bc of some internalized Orientalistic views? Or is it some form of Communion, that food is a way to sit together for a little while? Maybe a little bit of both?
Your wrote an essay a few months back in which you used a Chinese structure for your writing - I haven’t read it in some time, but I remember you circling around a central idea several times. As an English teacher, this piece really stuck with me. I spend inordinate amounts of time teaching The Structure of Writing Good Essays (often linear, often hierarchical), and your piece was so helpful for me to see my own limitations.
Thank you for sharing your writing; your emails truly are a highlight of my week.
Jeff, I very much would love to read anything and all that you would write or share about your heritage, your chinese culture, your chinese american experience, or anything of the sort. I, personally have so much to learn and love learning from your stories. I am grateful for your perspective.
Thanks for being courageous. You help others see what courage looks like.
Megan Phelps-Roper's existence gives my so much hope. I can't imagine what it must have been like for to step away from her church and her family. I'm so deeply grateful for her courage and her willingness to speak out, in grace, and ask for forgiveness.
And I'm so grateful for you Jeff for writing all this out so beautifully. Please write more about heritage / Chinese-Americanness, I want to hear more.
Loved all of this, Jeff, especially the offensive grace bits :-)
Your willingness to share your heart is not taken for granted. As an older, Canadian born, white, CIS gendered female, I feel like I might not have the right credentials to comment on an American Asian gay experience. That might be why some of us stay silent, even as we read your words to learn. Thank you for persisting!
Thank you for your words. Your writing always makes me think. I love what you said about Westbro and your friend and how the mental processing took time. And I agree that grace is easier said than done.
I admit, I’m not a cook so I scroll through the recipes. I would love to read more about your heritage and how it affects the way you see the world. I read the article on Steven Yeun and appreciate you linking it for us.
I rarely post anything. Anywhere. But as I read all these wonderful articulate thoughtful comments of other folks I am prompted to take a risk to say how meaningful your work has been to me too. My hope is that you are encouraged- good writing is hard & requires energy that must be next to impossible to tap during these times. But you are doing it. We appreciate you Jeff. Thank you for all u give and please be well.
Thank you Jeff for sharing this interesting piece about Korean family immagrants. I feel like I just had an inside look at how a child felt as he moved from Korea to America. I am so thankful for your writing and letting me learn from you as you share your "insides" too. You make life more interesting and beautiful!
Jeff this is beautiful. On the days i'm not sure i can believe what keeps me going is my firm belief in repentence, grace and reconciliation. I've stuggled a lot this past year with the Church and your steadfast faithfulness to loving your neighbor has been such a blessing to me. I know it's not a christian text but reading Megan's memoir this past summer had me in tears and was absolutely a spiritual experience. My husband who is on his own deconstruction journey references your compost spin on calvinist total depravity regularly. You have a beautiful way of describing what is broken and what is being resurrected. Your perspectives on your heritage, being gay in a conservative family, and being part of the reformed tradition continue to inspire and challenge me. So grateful and blessed to have the words of both of you in my life. Thank you.
A huge measure of grace brought Megan out of the darkness and into a friendship with you. She will be able to provide her daughter with an upbringing she never could have dreamed of for herself. I hope she finds her way to believe in God .He knows the correct timing for that.
thank you for telling us the story of a beautiful grace filled human named Megan. And you too! This softened my heart today. I look forward to reading the piece on Steven Yeun too.
I read Unfollow and found it fascinating. Glad you and Megan are friends! That gives me hope. ❤️
Jeff,
I first found you when you spoke for us by video at Crosspointe Church in Cary NC . I have been following you since and I have to say, I find what you write to be wonderfully comforting and reassuring, while also challenging my biases. And that is GOOD.
I see so much of myself in Megan's story. I didn't grow up in a Westboro exactly, but I did grow up in a very far right Southern Baptist church and then went to Liberty Univ in the early 90's and on to similar churches for much of my adult life.
Things were very black and white and Grace fit only in the place where "by Grace you are saved through faith". It didn't really go anywhere else because that would be giving folks a "pass" or permission or an excuse for their "sin" (aka, choice, behavior, belief, DIFFERENCE from us). "You know, people have to be held accountable for their behaviors.... "
I am sooooo very grateful to have had people like you, and Jonathan Bow and Stephen Daugherty who are brave enough to say, listen folks, FIRST Grace then truth. To remind us that Jesus died for us all. That my personhood is the same as everyone else's and I am not special because I'm a white cis-gendered female.
What is special is that as a white cis-gendered female I have, in this country, innate privilege and that can make me a powerful ally for others. I used to not know that. I couldn't see that, and I didn't really want to. Because, now I have a responsibility. A divine responsibility to be the hands and feet of Christ, in all the ways that I am uncomfortable.
Not just a little uncomfortable at the crisis pregnancy center where it feels familiar and easy to explain why I'm there, but a lot uncomfortable at the Pride march where my extended family will wonder if I have lost my mind, and many of them will be angry with me. I have for a long time seen people in " Mom hugs" and "Dad hugs" shirts at LGBTQ+events and wondered... what if I came in a 'Evangelical Christian Republican hugs' shirt? Would there be any takers? Would they be afraid? How do I say, "I see you, I see your value and worth and the hand of the Divine on you? Not because it wasn't there, but because I was BLIND!" without making it about me? How do I repair the bias and bigotry I know I have had in my heart for 20+ years that I thought was righteous, without it being about ME? How do I say I'm sorry without it being for ME? Enough with ME already....
I'm unraveling a lifetime of this mess in my heart and I am so grateful to have your words, and insight and heart to lean on and learn from.
Thank you Jeff Chu. I am growing because of you.
Tracy
I was reminded of all the people that I harmed when I had an adulterous affair with my husband and how I was labeled a brazen Hussi by the pastor when I wanted to repent. And other women in our small town who treated like the woman at the well.
Jeff- thanks for sharing this story. Since a brief and rewarding encounter with you a one of the "Why Christian" events, and reading about your Grandmother.... Dorothy and I frequently follow your stories knowing you will reveal to us things both visceral and profound. God bless you, Brother!